The After


IMAG1150I don’t know how much time I have to write this.  I haven’t had time to blog since Malcolm was born.  To get right to the point, this is really hard.  Really really really hard.  I had assumed I could handle two kids because its unlikely I would have two difficult infants in a row, right??  Silly me.

Malcolm is generally discontented with life outside the womb, but I know it will get better.  I know, I know, I know.  We are much more relaxed this time–I dropped a phone on his little head, bonked it against the bouncy chair, etc.  I’m surprised I haven’t concussed the poor kid.  But he cries most of the time and is very particular (no swing, no sleeping, no stroller, no carseat etc can calm him).  This reminds me of a particular little girl…

But I recall telling my small group that I wish I had a harder time with life since that would push me to pray for help.  Man, that prayer was answered big time.  I don’t think I’ve prayed so frequently ever.  I called Eric on Monday and told him this wasn’t working.  Something is gotta give because I’m severely unstable. I was serious. I don’t remember crying so much in a day. And for those of you who know me, that’s bad.

I sent out an SOS to some friends and have had a great response.  Friends try and come for a couple hours to pop in and see how they can help.  It has been great.

We spent so much time preparing for the birth, we didn’t give much thought to “after”.

But somehow I’m ok right this second because Eric is home, and somehow Malcolm is sleeping.  We got to have a quiet dinner together and Eric is playing with Vi.  And I have 10 minutes to write a blog.  Many of my prayers consist of “thank yous”.  Thank you for this evening.  Right this second I feel like we’ll be ok.  One day we’ll get to see a movie at the theatre…one day we’ll have our evenings for each other.  One day.


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