Monthly Archives: January 2013

This week


I’m sitting in a Panera Bread by myself wondering how long its been since I’ve been alone. Eric has some guys over and I have chosen to leave the house and go out into the world, pretending I don’t have any obligations tonight. I don’t know if the pumpkin muffin was worth it.
Speaking of which, I had my midwife appointment and I’m still continuing to gain a hefty amount of weight. Not quite as bad as last month, but not great. This midwife I saw seemed to be a bit more understanding of life circumstances and my limited options when it comes to exercise. I’m feeling rather large these days and I’m halfway through the pregnancy.  We moved our ultrasound appointment to 3 days from now…yikes! We have never found out the gender ahead of time, and while I know its a choice we’d like to make this time, I feel like it takes the mystery out of things. I feel like knowing the gender is just one more intrusion on the baby…one more talking point for people to focus on. A very twisted part of me loved it when I people would ask what gender Vi was and I told them we weren’t finding out. Its a lovely conversations stopper! Many people would get cranky they couldn’t buy pink or blue clothes for Vi ahead of time. I guess people will have enough to say about your reproductive life without speculations on gender adding to the mix. Like…”wow! You’re so much BIGGER with this boy than with a girl! I carried my girls so small…” etc etc. Sounds silly, but whatever.
I took Viola to the mall to play in the toddler play area this week. There was another boy there around 2 or 3 years old who clearly didn’t want her there. We ignored him until he decided to shove her away from every toy until she was too afraid to play with anything. She just stood there, watching him warily until he took off running straight for her and knocked her down…on purpose. Mama Bear came out after that. I picked up my crying child and marched right over to his mom (who was on the phone) and said “excuse me! Your kid keeps shoving my kid!” She yelled at him, but nothing came of it and there was no apology. I was forced to lead her around the play area and stand next to her to try and keep the kid from bullying her further. I had to shove my finger in his face and say, “back off” more than once. I have a lot of grace for little kids who don’t really practice sharing until much later. Now that I’m  a parent, I get that.  It is not the first time Vi has had toys stolen from her or been shoved away from a desirable toy. I try not to intervene if she doesn’t fall apart. One day she’ll be shoving other kids for toys and I’ll have to address that. But this was blatant bullying by a little boy toward a timid little girl. I wonder how he’ll turn out when he’s older? Oh well.